This past weekend I’ve just taken some time for myself and tried to decompress. For the first time since Dad’s death I didn’t have anything that needed immediate attention from my students, although starting Wednesday I’ll have some fifty or sixty portfolios to look at and get graded by the following Monday. I also start teaching Composition I at MCCC that Monday, so over the next couple of days I’ll have to look at the required textbook for that class and try to figure out some kind of lesson plan. Yesterday and today, though, I kind of took some time for myself here to relax and unwind, play some video games, do some shopping, and watch a bit of television. (Unfortunately I was out shopping during the Red Wings’ game Saturday and wound up missing Darren McCarty’s first fight since rejoining the Wings, guh.) I’d wanted to do some cleaning in my room, but that didn’t wind up happening and I’ll probably have to get to it two weeks from now.

Leaves have begun to spring up on some of the trees in our backyard, and I can’t help but think of how Dad’s not here to see them now. As we’ve been going through his stuff recently, we’ve unearthed a lot of the sketches and paintings he used to do back before he started his own business; I had pretty much forgotten he’d ever done them, but once I saw them I remembered, "Oh yeah, I saw those when I was a kid." He had this way of drawing leaves on trees when he worked in pen-and-ink where we just made these curlicues all over the place, and somehow it worked; I remember trying to imitate that style when I was young and failing at it. (As always, stick a writing implement in my hand and all my manual dexterity goes to crap.) I’ll probably put some of his work online here on the .org soon — I’ve been meaning to do an online tribute to him, but time just hasn’t been on my side for that — but it’s painful to realize that twenty years ago he just stopped doing that stuff because he got so wrapped up in running his business that he cut all his fun, all his social activities, out of his life. (In case you were wondering where I got that from … yeah.)

As I see spring turn to summer here (although we may be getting some snow overnight after hitting 80 on Friday …), I can’t help but wonder if Dad was able to appreciate the changing of the seasons. We had that lunar eclipse a few days before his death, and I can remember him and Mom taking a look at it after I pointed it out to him, but a full lunar eclipse is one of those rare, irregular occasions you kind of make a point of observing. Even coming from a family of Wiccans, I don’t think we do all that much to recognize when the seasons change and all the beauty that’s out there waiting to be explored. If I were to pass away suddenly, I wouldn’t want it said of me that I was too wrapped up in my work and my other pursuits to be able to enjoy the simple beauty of the first green leaves budding on trees in the spring. I think I’m overdue for a trip to Wildwood or the Toledo Botanical Garden. I’ll do what I can to make that trip before I start getting weighed down with portfolios.